Community Psychology: A Study of Arrested Development
by BKelly95
Summary: Michael Bluth returns to Greendale Community College to oversee construction of a new building. While there, he runs into Jeff Winger's study group. Chaos ensues.
1. Return To Greendale

Community Psychology: A Study Of Arrested Development.

AN: Hello. Welcome to the story.  
"Arrested Development" was one of my favorite sitcoms when I discovered it in the fall of 2003. It absolutely hurt when the show was cancelled two and a half years later. I honestly thought there wouldn't be another sitcom like it.  
Then came "Community". Granted, later seasons ended up doing their own (extremely wacky) thing, but season one could best be described as "Arrested Development" at a community college. Since they've done so many homage/parody episodes, I thought one involving "Arrested Development" would be awesome.  
This would take place during season four of "Community", but I don't have a set time period for when it takes place in AD's continuity. BTW, if you're concerned about a chance that this might not end up being completed, I've already written out all five chapters and I plan to post them one a day.  
And we're off.

Chapter 1:Return to Greendale.

At Greendale Community College, seven students of various ages and races sat around a table in the library's study room. A black-haired, young woman detailed several interesting facts about Jonathan Swift. The background music could best be described as jaunty alternative.

A fit, slender man with finely styled, brown hair leaned back in his chair and watched the girl. An unseen narrator who sounded like Ron Howard spoke up.

_"This is Jeff Winger. He used to be a lawyer until three years ago when a colleague reported him to the Bar Association for falsifying his educational history. Shortly afterwards, he enrolled in Greendale Community College to earn an actual degree and ended up becoming friends with this study group. Jeff doesn't know it yet, but he's about to face one of the most trying experiences of his life."_

"...and the bulk of his fortune went to fund a hospital for the mentally ill." said the girl.

"Are you sure it was a good idea to write a report on an essay advocating cannibalism?" asked a muscular, black man.

"Actually, it's a satire." said a tall, skinny man of Middle Eastern descent. "He's presenting a solution that's so outrageous, you can't possibly take it seriously."

"Oh." said the black man. "That explains it."

"Okay." said Jeff. "It sounds like a great report, but not all of us did the extra credit assignment. So, let's hit the books."

As he and the others opened their textbooks, someone else said "Now, that's a great idea."

Everyone turned to the doorway to see a man with brown hair leaning against it. The background music changed to a light salsa/jazz fusion.

"It's so nice to see another study group getting some use out this room." said the man as he approached the table. "Hi, I'm Michael Bluth. I can't begin to count the number of hours I've spent here. I remember this time..."

_"This is Michael Bluth. Michael graduated from Greendale twenty years ago after earning a degree as a business major. During his time here, he also met his late wife Tracey. He is now giving back to his alma mater by overseeing construction of a new house for the Ypsilon Nu Beta fraternity. Today, Michael is happy."_

"...in the garden." said Michael.

Everyone at the table laughed...

...except for a blonde woman wearing a black leather jacket. "Wait, YOU'RE Michael Bluth?" she asked.

"Yes, I am." said Michael.

The woman jumped out of her chair and grabbed a cup that had been sitting in front of her.

_"This is Britta Perry, anarchist cat owner."_

Britta threw the cup at Michael, ejecting the water inside at him. The action paused.

_"She **isn't** happy."_

The action unpaused and the water continued its flight. Michael put up his hands to shield himself, but still got drenched. Everyone looked at Britta in shock.

"Britta!" yelled a middle-aged black woman.

"What the hell?" yelled Michael.

_"Britta is upset because construction of the frat house conflicts with one of her causes."_

(Flashback)

Britta walked through the lounge when a skinny, bald man wearing glasses stopped her. "Britta, there you are." he said. "I'm afraid I have some bad news. I ran your proposal by the board of directors and they passed over your suggestion for a psychological center. They've opted to build a new frat house for the Nu Beta's instead."

"What?" said Britta. "How could they do that?"

"I'm sorry, Britta." said the man, Dean Craig Pelton. "The Nu Beta's are a very influential fraternity. Some of their members are on the security detail and have been known to detain students for the most trivial matters."

"No, I don't accept this!" said Britta. "This college needs a psych center! There are students here who need the help. Like Annie, and Neil, and Garrett..."

"I thought we already helped Garrett." said Pelton.

They turned to look at a pudgy man with brown hair and glasses as he stood on a stepstool trying to hang a notice on the bulletin board. The stepstool slipped out from under him and he ended up hanging from the top by his fingernails.

Britta and Pelton looked back at each other. "Did we really?" asked Britta.

(End flashback)

"And now the student body is going to be a lot crazier because of that!" said Britta.

"What are you yelling at me for?" asked Michael as he ran a paper towel over his arms. "I don't have a say in how the building is used!" He went to wipe off his face and said "I just build the (bleep)ing thing!"

"Sugar, you better watch that mouth or the good lord will have issues." said the black woman.

_"This is Shirley Bennett, sandwich maker, housewife, and very devout Christian. She'd probably lecture Michael some more, but she's in a good mood today. Her sandwich shop has taken an upswing in business due to Michael's construction workers frequenting it on their lunch breaks. We must note they'd be visiting it whether they were building a psych center or a frat house."_

"Sorry." said Michael. "My builders have a serious swearing problem. I should probably stop spending so much time around them."

"Britta, you gotta be careful." said the black man. "Those Nu Beta's are crazy. Last week, I bumped into one of them while reading a book. They still haven't returned it, saying it's theirs now."

_"Troy Barnes was a football player in high school. He was poised for a scholarship for a major university when..."_

(Flashback)

High schooler Troy met with the school's football coach in the hallway.

"Well, Troy." said the coach. "What's the decision?"

"Sorry, I just don't think I'm cut out for university football." said Troy.

"Well, we'll just have to keep bugging you until you're unable to play." said the coach.

_"Troy injured himself doing a keg flip the following night."_

(End flashback)

"I need that book back." said Troy. "It was due back at the library yesterday."

"Troy, what are you saying?" asked the black-haired girl. "If this psychological center is built, a lot of issues could be dealt with."

_"Annie Edison knows what she's talking about. In high school, she was a straight-A student poised for a scholarship for a major university until..."_

(Flashback)

"Well, we'll just have to keep bugging you until you're unable to play." said the coach.

"I'll think about it at the party tomorrow ni..." said Troy.

"Everyone's a robot!" yelled Annie as she ran past them and through a plate glass window.

(End flashback)

"Just out of curiosity," said an older man with grey hair and glasses "do you have someone to show you around campus?"

_"Pierce Hawthorne returned to college out of loneliness. He decided to stay until he found a new circle of friends. He is currently in his fourteenth year of this mission."_

(Flashback)

Pierce stood in a classroom with a group of students. "Come on, you can't ask for it back." he said. "That would make you an Indian giver."

A Native American man stormed out of the room and yelled "Not cool, Pierce!"

"Gary!" said Pierce. "I didn't see you there! Come back!"

(Flashback)

Pierce sat at a table with another group of students.

"My personal suggestion is that we get Mary's boyfriend to help." he said.

A brown-haired woman groaned, got up, and stormed out.

"What?" yelled Pierce.

(Flashback)

Pierce had another student in a headlock. "Say it!" he yelled.

"Rusty Burger's shakes are superior!" yelled the other student.

_"Gee. I wonder why."_

(End flashbacks)

"Well, if you really want to, I don't see why not." said Michael. "I think I might have to change my shirt, though."

"Fantastic!" said Pierce. He got up and left with Michael.

"I'll go make sure he doesn't embarrass us." said Jeff.

"Troy, I just had an idea." said the Middle Eastern man.

_"Abed Nadir entered Greendale to learn to be a filmmaker. Once there, he hooked up with Troy to form one of the strongest partnerships ever."_

"Yeah?" asked Troy.

"I'm thinking that the construction process might make for an interesting documentary." said Abed. "And with Pierce involved, there's a very strong chance of drama."

"Sounds like a disaster in the making." said Troy. "I'll carry the equipment."

"Cool." said Abed. "Cool cool cool."

They tapped their right hands together while patting their chests with their left. They got up to leave.

"I gotta get back to the shop." said Shirley as she got up to leave. "The lunch rush is coming up and Michael's workers have been there every day this week."

After Shirley left, Britta got up and walked over to Annie. "Annie, come with me." she said. "I have an idea of how to stop this frat house. We have to get to the lawyer's office."

"Britta, I have to print out this report!" said Annie as she held up a flash drive.

"Annie! The sanity of this college is depending on you!" said Britta. "You can print your report when you get back!" she added as she grabbed Annie's wrist.

In the hallway, Jeff watched Pierce talk with Michael as Troy and Abed left the study room.

"Hey, Michael." said Abed. "Troy and I were wondering if you would be willing to let us follow you and film you for a documentary."

"Well, it wouldn't be the first time." said Michael. "Sure, you can come with me."

"Sweet." said Troy.

The four of them left together.

"This can't end well." muttered Jeff.

_"So, why is Michael happy? Because he's vowed never to set foot on campus again."_


	2. Legal Briefs

Community Psychology: A Study Of Arrested Development.

Chapter 2: Legal Briefs.

A white Volkswagen Golf pulled up in front of an office building.

_"Britta and Annie made their way to the lawyer's office to enact their plan."_

Britta and Annie entered the office and Britta whispered "Okay, do you know the plan?"

"Yes, but what am I doing here?" asked Annie. "Most of your plan seems to involve only you."

"Because you're plan B." said Britta as she briefly glanced at Annie's chest.

"What do you mean by..." Annie started to ask when she gasped and crossed her arms over her chest.

Britta walked up to the receptionist's desk and said to the man sitting there "Excuse me. I would like to ask about the Greendale Project."

"The Greendale Project." said the receptionist.

"Yes." said Britta. "I know for a fact that this firm handles the affairs of the Ypsillon Nu Beta fraternity at Greendale Community College. I need some information on the current building project for the frat house."

"And that would be specifically called 'The Greendale Project'?" asked the receptionist.

"Just get me the damn information." said Britta.

The receptionist pushed a button on his intercom and said "Taylor, please come to reception."

Annie looked at her watch and sighed. As a middle-aged man walked up to the reception counter, Annie snuck past him and made her way down the hallway.

"I am Taylor Strong." said the man. "I'm the lawyer currently assigned to the Ypsillon Nu Beta fraternity. What can I help you with?"

"I think I've discovered an issue with the construction of the new frat house at Greendale Community College." said Britta. "Evidently, the building to be constructed was originally planned to be a psychological center. Now, the building can't be built as a frat house."

Taylor looked at her in confusion while Annie snuck over to an office door.

"I don't think it works that way." said Taylor.

"Well, what would you say if I told you I was a law student?" asked Britta.

"I'd say you're the worst." said Taylor. "What ruling could possibly support your insane idea of a legal procedure?"

Britta watched as Annie tested the doorknob to the office and found it unlocked. She peeked through the door and snuck in.

"It's the...Edison Principle." said Britta.

In the office, Annie found a computer and a printer fully loaded with paper. "Yes!" she whispered.

Troy and Abed looked at the construction site for the frat house.

_"Meanwhile, Troy and Abed made plans to get the dirt on...dirt."_

"So, what's the plan?" asked Troy.

"Okay." said Abed. "You go up and talk to the first worker you see. While he's distracted, I sneak in and steal a pair of hard hats and vests. Once I return to you, I give you one of each while taking one for myself. Then we sneak back into the site, posing as workers while avoiding the worker you talked to in the first place. After an hour of poking around, we bounce."

The foreman walked over to them and said "Hey, what are you two doing just standing around talking? Get in there, get suited up, and get the (bleep) to work!"

After the foreman walked off, Abed turned to Troy and said "That was a freebie."

_"At the law office, Annie **borrowed** some materials to create her report._

Annie looked over her report and headed for the door. As she stepped into the hallway, Britta and Taylor finished their conversation.

"Look, we can't just overturn a decision because some people think it's wrong!" yelled Taylor. "Now, the frat house is proceeding as planned and you need to just accept it!"

He turned to the hallway while Britta turned to the exit.

Britta buried her face in her hands and groaned "I'm the worst (bleep)ing attorney."

Annie tried to step back into the office, but Taylor spotted her and stormed over to her. "This area is employees and clients only!" he said.

"I...uh..." said Annie nervously.

"Wait, what's this?" asked Taylor as he took Annie's report from her. "'A Modest Proposal' by Annie Ed...So, there is an Edison Principle. Am I to assume you wrote it?"

"It's got my name on it, right?" asked Annie, suddenly relieved.

"And you look so young too." said Taylor. "I'd swear you were still in college."

"Marry me!" giggled Annie.

"Say, could you give us a hand with some other cases?" asked Taylor.

"Maybe later." said Annie. "My ride's waiting."

"Come back soon." said Taylor.

_"In the cafeteria, Pierce showed Michael around and introduced him to the new decor."_

"Wow, it's just like I remember it." said Michael.

"But the students are different." said Pierce. "Yo, Magnitude!"

A small, black man with dreadlocks and glasses pointed to him and smiled. He then made a "raise the roof" gesture and said "Pop pop!"

"How does he know dad?" asked Michael.

Jeff entered the cafeteria. He found Pierce and Michael and shadowed them.

"Leonard, is Pierce here?" asked Jeff.

"He's right over there with Michael Bluth." said a short, old man wearing a hat.

"How do you know who Michael Bluth is?" asked Jeff.

"I've been here long enough." said Leonard.

Pierce and Michael turned to look at them and Michael got surprised.

"Leonard?" he asked. "What are you still doing here?"

Leonard just shrugged.

"Jeff, come for lunch?" asked Pierce.

"I just wanted to see how you two were doing." said Jeff.

"Not bad." said Pierce. "Excuse me. I need to get a sandwich."

A pair of construction workers made their way to the counter at Shirley's Sandwiches.

"Welcome to Shirley's Sandwiches." said Shirley. "How may I help you?"

"Yeah, I'd like a turkey club with no mayo." said one worker.

"I'll take a roast beef with cheddar on a hard roll." said the other.

"What do you say?" asked Shirley sweetly.

"As soon as (bleep)ing possible!" said the first worker.

Shirley's eyes widened in shock. "Did you have to use that word?" she asked sternly.

"Are you going to get us our (bleep) or not?" asked the other.

"Fine." said Shirley. "You don't have to get nasty."

The workers tried to go to the serving counter, only to find Garrett rummaging through his sandwich.

"Hey, move it." said one worker.

"I'm checking to see if there's anything I'm allergic to in this." said Garrett.

"He said to get the (bleep) out of the way." said the other worker.

"Hey, you don't talk to Garrett like that!" said Shirley. "I have half a mind to.."

A security guard marched over and blew his whistle.

_"And that's when the Nu Beta's made their presence known."_

"Crisis alert!" said Garrett as he grabbed his sandwich and ran.

"What seems to be going on here?" asked the guard.

"These guys were being rude to Garrett." said Shirley.

"So?" asked the guard. "No one's nice to Garrett."

"Excuse me?" asked Shirley.

"Mrs. Bennett." said the guard sternly. "These men are doing an important job for this college."

_"Again, we must stress that they'd be doing this job on either a frat house or a psych center."_

"I really don't see any reason to impede these men from their task." said the guard. "Just let this one slide and there will be no problems."

"You just want them to finish working on your frat house!" said Shirley.

"You better check that attitude or else." said the guard.

Shirley turned away defeated.

"Wow, these Nu Beta's don't mess around." said Michael.

"I know." said Jeff. "They've been known to throw students into their jail for the most trivial matters."

"They have a jail?" asked Michael.

"They had it specially made." said Jeff. "Fortunately, I took precautions."

(Flashback)

AN:Professional lawyer. Do not attempt.

Jeff popped a key into his mouth.

"I found out the model of lock used on their cell."

He ran to the sink and spit out the key.

"Then, I bought a copy of the key they use."

He tried to swallow the key again, this time with a milk chaser.

"That way, if I get arrested..."

He ran to the sink and spit up the key again.

"...I can just pass the key and unlock the cell."

Jeff finally swallowed the key successfully.

(End flashback)

"Can they do that?" asked Michael.

"Of course not." said Jeff. "I mean I don't think so. They couldn't...I mean they...there's probably something in the college bylaws. Hang on, I have to go take a look at that."

He ran out.

Pierce marched up to the counter behind the construction workers. "Okay, let's keep this moving." he said.

"Wait your turn, old man." said one of the workers.

"Old man?" asked Pierce. "I'll have you know I was out there making myself useful long before you were born."

"And now you're making yourself (bleep)ing useless." said the other worker.

"God, what is he doing?" asked Michael.

"Don't you think you should be showing some respect to your elders?" asked Pierce.

"Don't you think you should hurry the (bleep) up and (bleep)ing die already?" asked the first worker.

"You weren't here for the twenty eleven paintball war with City College!" yelled Pierce. "Who do you think won it for us? It wasn't you!"

"This won't end well." said Leonard.

"Shut up, Leonard!" snapped Michael. "I have no idea why I just said that."

The security guard marched up and blew his whistle. "Stop right there!" he ordered. "Hawthorne, back off! You two, go on."

"Like hell I will!" yelled Pierce. "Other people need to get sandwiches too! What makes these two so special?"

"Back off now!" ordered the guard. "You're already two steps beyond my tolerance level!"

"You're just forcing us to kiss the asses of the workers building your (bleep)ing frat house!" said Pierce.

_"Again, we'd like to remind you...ah, forget it."_

"And as long as they're here, you must bow down for them!" said the guard.

"Bow down to this!" yelled Pierce. He then blew a raspberry.

"Alright, let's go!" yelled the guard. He grabbed Pierce and turned him around forced his hands behind his back.

"Stop this right now!" yelled Pierce. "You are the pebble in my shoe! You are the snot I wipe from my nose!"

Michael watched in horror as security handcuffed Pierce. Jeff ran in.

"Okay, I checked the bylaws." said Jeff. "It turns out..."

"You are the opposite of Batman!" yelled Pierce.

"Oh, come on!" yelled Jeff.

Michael looked at him strangely.


	3. Piercing Armor

Community Psychology: A Study Of Arrested Development.

Chapter 3: Piercing Armor

Jeff sat at the table in the study room and played with his phone.

_"After Pierce was arrested, Jeff returned to the study room to think about his next move. That's when Britta returned from her last move."_

Britta marched into the study room and said "First the good news: I was not arrested for impersonating a lawyer."

"Good." said Jeff. "Wait, there was a possibility of that?"

"Where's Pierce?" asked Britta. "I thought you were keeping an eye on him."

"Something happened in the cafeteria." said Jeff. "He's been arrested by security."

"What?" yelled Britta. "(bleep)!"

"He got into an argument with Michael Bluth's workers and it got nasty." said Jeff.

"And what did they do about the workers?" asked Britta.

"They did nothing." said Jeff. "They used the excuse that they couldn't do anything with them because they weren't students. Don't worry about them. Michael said he'd handle it."

At the construction site, Michael handled it.

"The way you treated that old man and that sandwich maker was completely insensitive and unprofessional! I want you both to go back there and apologize to them and don't come back until you do! And I don't want to hear about any (bleep)ing or (bleep)ing or (bleep)ing or back (bleep)ing or cross (bleep)ing..."

Abed filmed him while Troy stared slack-jawed.

Back in the study room, Jeff got up and walked over to Britta. "Where's Annie?" he asked.

"She said she had a thing to do." said Britta. "I have no idea what she meant by that."

"I'm sure she'll call if she needs help." said Jeff. "Right now, we have some other business to take care of. I'm going to work on getting Pierce out of jail while you can continue trying to stop this frat house."

"Do you really think I have a chance at that?" asked Britta.

"No." said Jeff in a sneering tone. "I just want you out of the way while I try to avert disaster. In the meantime, you can keep trying. And just remember you can't impersonate a lawyer without a college degree."

_"Meanwhile, Annie was impersonating a lawyer without a college degree."_

"'It was lying there' is not a valid excuse." said Annie to a client. "If it's not yours, you have to ask permission. You don't even need a law degree to know that."

_"While Annie was explaining the concept of sharing, Britta decided to pay the dean a visit."_

Britta marched into Dean Pelton's apartment and threw open the door to the bathroom to find the shower running. Pelton, almost naked, yelped.

"We need to talk." she said sternly.

"Can't you see I'm about to get into the shower?" yelled Pelton.

Britta looked at his crotch to see him wearing cutoff jean shorts.

"It's about Pierce." said Britta.

"Ah, yes." said Pelton. "I heard about that."

"Well, are you going to help us free him or not?" asked Britta.

"It's not that simple." said Pelton. "Pierce has a long list of complaints against him since enrolling thirteen years ago. Just ask Mary. He suggested that her pyromaniac boyfriend help out with a bonfire protesting air pollution."

"I know that Pierce has a long history of getting on people's bad sides." said Britta. "But he was just standing up to a couple of bullies this time. Surely, that must be commended."

"It is commendable." said Pelton. "But that's not the way security sees it. Michael Bluth's workers are building their frat house and they run the college security squad, so security is looking out for the workers. I can try to talk to the guards."

"Well, what can I do?" asked Britta.

"If enough people are opposed to the frat house," said Pelton "you could get the attention of the board of directors and possibly change their minds. It's a stretch, but it might work. Now, if you don't mind."

Pelton took off his glasses and stepped into the shower. Britta smiled.

_"Britta suddenly had an idea for dealing with Pierce as Jeff went to visit Michael and convince him to help with the situation."_

Jeff marched into the cafeteria and made his way to Michael's table.

_"He took a more direct approach."_

"Get Pierce the (bleep) out of jail now!" he demanded.

"I'll talk to the security guards as soon as I can." said Michael. "But they seemed pretty pissed. I think that Pierce has that kind of effect."

"Yeah, he does." said Jeff.

"So, why do you want him out of jail?" asked Michael.

"Well, regardless of his behavior, he's still a friend." said Jeff. "Our study group is not just a bunch of students in the same class studying the same thing. We're practically family. I'm sure you know what it's like to have a member of your family who's a little screwed up."

"Just one?" asked Michael. "No. Sounds great, though."

"So, I can surely count on your assistance getting Pierce out of jail." said Jeff.

"Why me?" asked Michael.

"Well, I thought you might have a better chance than I did since you used to be a Nu Beta." said Jeff.

"Whoa." said Michael. "I was not with the Nu Beta's. I was in the Tri-Xi frat."

"Did you just say you were with Tri-Xi?" asked a skinny man with a buzz cut.

"Yes, I did." said a confused Michael.

"Hey, brother!" said the man. "Professor Holly, Greendale pottery teacher."

They shook hands and Michael looked at his hand in disgust. "You've got something on your hands." he said.

"It's modelling clay." said Professor Holly. "Occupational hazard. I'm a monster."

_"Professor Holly was about to share some stories of the fraternity, as well as a scathing rant about the movie 'Ghost', when Garrett ran in with a crisis alert."_

"There's a situation developing at the construction site!" yelled Garrett as he ran into the cafeteria.

Jeff and Michael made their way to the construction site to find Britta leading a protest. Troy and Abed stood next to a table full of musical instruments.

"What's happening?" asked Jeff.

"Britta's formed a mob to protest the frat house." said Troy. "She's hoping that enough people complaining will convince the board of directors to establish a psych center and release Pierce."

"Okay, relax." said Michael. "Soon, we'll have the area clear of protestors, angry workers, and musical instruments. Why do you guys have musical instruments?"

"Sound effects." said Abed. "Great documentaries always have sound cues at key moments."

"Britta, what are you doing?" yelled Jeff.

"The people of Greendale are mad, Jeff!" yelled Britta. "They want to cast down the shackles of the security guards and establish a new facility for mental healing!"

"And get Pierce released." said Jeff.

"Well, yes. That too." said Britta.

Several protestors looked at each other, then walked away.

"Don't you remember what happened with Pierce?" asked Jeff. "The guards carted him off just for arguing with Michael's workers and this is something much worse!"

"This is something much more important!" said Britta. "This college needs psychological assistance!"

"Yes, I see that every day!" said Jeff. "But right now, I'm not convinced we should be going to this extent!"

"That's the problem!" said Britta. "You're not going far enough with your support!"

"That's because I'm not stupid enough to risk my neck for such a hopeless battle!" yelled Jeff.

"Enough!" yelled Michael as a low, droning sound was heard. "What is wrong with you people? Jeff, I thought you were a well put together, caring lawyer, but you're just as thoughtless and selfish as the guys you're opposing! Britta, I thought you could think clearly about whatever cause you were pursuing, but you just do it in such a confrontational and overbearing way it's no wonder you have trouble! And Abed, you can't do that in post?"

He turned to Abed who had a trombone at his lips. He pulled it away and the droning stopped. "I thought we were having a moment." he said sheepishly.

"Well, if you're really dedicated to a cause..." said Britta.

"Which is great unless..." said Jeff.

"Stop." said Michael. "Just stop. I've had it. As soon as I give my speech, I'm heading back to California. I've giving you no choice but to keep yourselves together."

He stormed off while Jeff and Britta looked on in dismay.

AN: To any AD fans who haven't watched "Community", Professor Holly was played by Tony "Buster" Hale.


	4. TBA

Community Psychology: A Study Of Arrested Development.

Chapter 4: TBA

The study group members (sans Pierce) sat around their table.

_"After Michael announced his intention to leave, it became clear that the group was running out of options."_

"I think we really Britta'd this situation." said Jeff. "Sorry."

"No, we did Britta this situation." said Britta.

"Does anybody have any other ideas?" asked Shirley.

"Nothing comes to mind." said Abed.

"I'm also at a loss." said Jeff.

"Maybe we could release Troy's monkey into the vents and get the health department on them." said Britta.

"Britta!" said Annie. "That's not a good idea. The ruling of 'People vs. June Bauer' stated that an investigation would have to be started."

"That's right." said Jeff. "And the investigation would most likey...wait, how would you know that?"

Annie suddenly looked worried and said "No reason."

Britta grabbed one of the folders on Annie's pile of books and looked at the title. "'Barry Zuckercorn vs. State of...' Annie, these are court documents!"

"Those are legal!" yelled Jeff. "Where did you get these?"

"The...law office?" said Annie quietly.

"That thing you had to do?" asked Britta. "You were working as a lawyer and you didn't tell us!"

"Well, what do you want me to do?" yelled Annie. "I'm not a real lawyer! I'm only pretending to be one for...I don't know anymore!"

"You could turn the firm's attention to the frat house or Pierce!" yelled Britta.

"Britta, would you please stop it with the frat house already?" yelled Jeff.

"How can you not take my side?" yelled Britta. "She's got your old job and she's succeeding where you should be!"

"Well, at least I'm not going after some lost cause!" yelled Annie.

"Would all of you just shut the (bleep) up!" yelled Shirley. "We are in the middle of a (bleep)ing crisis here and you (bleep)ing idiots are yelling at each other like (bleep)ing children! If we want to (bleep)ing do something to help Pierce or stop this (bleep)ing frat house, we can't fall the (bleep) apart!"

Everybody stared at her in shock.

_"And Shirley realized that Michael had a point about his workers."_

Shirley suddenly looked scared and ran from the study room.

"Look, guys." said Jeff. "Sorry. It's just that this whole thing with Pierce has me on edge. I've tried my best legal maneuvering and it's not working."

"I could try what Britta suggested." said Annie. "But I'm afraid it might look suspicious. If they notice that I'm looking into a case that came up just before I got there, I might be shown the door and then I can't help anybody."

"We could have gotten Michael to help." said Jeff. "Unfortunately, our bickering pretty much sent him back to California."

"He's not leaving until he delivers his speech for the frat house." said Abed. "You could go after him at his hotel and beg him to help."

"He's not going to help us." said Jeff. "In fact, I don't think he wants anything more to do with us."

"The least you can do is apologize." said Troy.

_"And Jeff realized that he did owe Michael an apology."_

Jeff went over to Michael's hotel room and sat facing him. "I'm sorry." he said.

"That is literally the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me." said Michael.

"Michael." said Jeff. "You come across as a very giving guy. You single-handedly handled your dad's trial and your relatives' personal issues. You had this house built on Greendale's campus, which is something not every graduate would do. So, it hurts me that you just pack up and run when we need you the most."

"There's a lot about my dad's case you don't know." said Michael. "It's true that I single-handedly handled the case and my family's personal issues, but that was because I had to. Most of them were unwilling to help me with dad's case or their problems. I'm always seen as the go-to guy for solving problems. After all the taking and taking, I finally got fed up and left. I thought that if I helped them out, they'd be moved to be more generous and helpful, but it didn't work out that way. It's like they're in a state of prolonged adolescence. You know, 'arrested development'."

_"Hey! That's the name of his show!"_

"And when you and Britta started with your demands, I thought that you were becoming just like them and it scared me." said Michael. "You and your study group, you're practically a family. In fact, you're more of a family than my own family."

"Well, we're more like a community." said Jeff.

_"And that's the name of HIS show!"_

"We have our issues." said Jeff. "We have our problems. We also have each other. Maybe we are more of a family than yours."

Jeff's cell phone rang. He answered.

"This is Jeff."

"Jeff!" said Annie on the other end. "Did you take any of my legal briefs?"

"What? No!" said Jeff. "I came right here after I found out about those."

"Oh God." said Annie. "Britta must have taken it."

"Wait, what's going on?" asked Jeff.

"I was getting ready to return to the office and I found that one of my legal briefs was missing."

"So, just call Britta and ask for it back." said Jeff.

"She's not answering her cell phone." said Annie. "But that's not important. The missing brief was about an arson case. It contained details that could give Britta the means to cause serious destruction. Serious destruction, Jeff."

Jeff quietly hung up. "I have to get back to college." he said.

"I have to give the speech." said Michael. "Maybe you can give me a lift."

_"Jeff returned to the college campus as soon as he could. Along the way, he reasoned that Britta would try to use her ill-gotten information on the house itself and decided to concentrate his search there."_

Jeff ran over behind the house. He found Britta trying to pry open a box on the back wall. "Britta, what are you doing?" he asked.

"I'm taking a stand, Jeff." said Britta. "I can't let the Nu Beta's succeed."

"Stop." said Jeff. "Getting caught could get you into serious trouble."

"This college is already in serious trouble." said Britta as she turned to face him.

"Yes, I know you're willing to sacrifice yourself for what you believe in." said Jeff. "But are you willing to make this big a sacrifice? Don't you know what the penalty for what you're doing is?"

"First time!" said Britta.

"I've never heard of a second." said Jeff.

He let that sink in before continuing.

"Look, Britta." said Jeff. "I know I make a lot of speeches. Maybe I'm making this one just to make you feel better. Maybe no one else will hear this. Maybe it won't change anything. But I need you to realize that you may be going too far this time. Britta, sometimes you just can't win.

"It's true the Nu Beta's are bullies, but they're bullies with authority. Pierce is already paying the price for their boorishness. For once, he's an innocent victim. I'm sure the Nu Beta's have no shortage of those in their wake. Someday, the people will band together and rise up against them. But that's not today. You can't take them on all by yourself and neither can I. So, what do you say? Leave this for another day?"

Britta set down her knife and walked over to Jeff. He hugged her.

"Come on." he said. "Let's try not to arrouse suspicions."

_"Jeff did manage to calm Britta down, but he was wrong about two things..."_

Michael watched them from behind a bulldozer.

_"Someone else had heard the speech and it did end up changing everything."_

A crowd of students gathered in front of the new frat house where Dean Pelton stood on a stage.

"Greetings, students." he said. "You can see before you the new frat house for the Ypsilon Nu Beta fraternity. Let's have a big round of applause for this new establishment."

The students all applauded while Michael walked out on stage.

"And here is the man behind the house's construction, Mr. Michael Bluth!" said Pelton.

Michael faced the crowd and said "You know, a lot has changed since I went to Greendale. Since I graduated, I see you've added a new school flag, a statue of Luis Guzman, and a new mascot."

He looked to the ethnicly neutral humanoid figure and shuddered.

"Anyway," he continued "I came here to congratulate the Nu Beta's on their new frat house and take pride in a job well done...but I'm not going to."

Everyone (including Jeff and Britta) looked at him in confusion.

"It has come to my attention that someone initially suggested a psych center for Greendale's students." said Michael. "However, the bullies at Nu Beta have forced the board of directors to grant them a new house instead. It was the words of a man named Jeff Winger that pointed me in the right direction as he was willing to go the extra mile to save a friend from the bullies.

"In my opinion, a psych center would be better used to help the Greendale student body, not just a gang of bullies looking to assert their power over the innocents. All in all, you probably should have made this a frat house since you've openly rejected mental health. Thank you."

He stepped off of the stage amidst the roar of the students discussing what had just happened.

"Wow." said Troy.

"Cool." said Abed. "Twist ending."

Michael walked over to Jeff and Britta.

"Mr. Bluth, that was a rather stirring speech." said Jeff.

"I was inspired by one of the best." said Michael.

"It's nice to see whose side you're on." said Britta.

"I meant every word I said." said Michael.

"Ah, Michael." said Pelton as he walked over. "It turns out that the board of directors was in the audience and they really enjoyed your speech. They had an emergency session and I have both good news and bad news."

"Yes?" asked Michael.

"The good news is that they had an emergency vote and decided that the Nu Beta's have overstepped their authority." said Pelton. "So, they've suspended the fraternity's charter until they can decide how to proceed. And since they can't give a house to a fraternity without a charter, they've decided to designate the house as a psych center for the time being."

"Yes!" cheered Britta. "People can make a difference!"

"What's the bad news?" asked Jeff.

"The bad news is that the Nu Beta's on the security detail aren't too thrilled with you two." said Pelton. "Since they've just lost their frat house, they've announced they are going to imprison the men responsible, you and Michael."

"Wait, whoa!" said Michael. "They can't detain me. I graduated twenty years ago."

"I know." said Pelton. "When I told them that, they just decided to lock up Jeff instead."

Two men in security guard uniforms marched over and started to handcuff Jeff.

"Jeff!" gasped Britta.

"Relax." said Jeff. "I'll be out by midnight."

"Yes, right." said Michael. "I'm sure that calmer heads will prevail and they'll release Jeff when their charter is restored."

_"The charter was revoked two hours later and Jeff spent the next day in the security group's holding cell."_

A sign reading "Star-Burns Memorial Psych Center" was unveiled in front of the frat house.

_"Meanwhile, the board of directors made good on their promise to redesignate the house as a psych center. In return for her work in lobbying for it, Britta was given an internship there."_

Britta sat and watched as a psychology professor psychoanalyzed Garrett.

"And how long have you had these hallucinations?" asked the professor.

"Over the past month." said Garrett. "Last week, I saw a doctor...there was no doctor."

In the security center, a guard shoved Jeff into the same cell as Pierce and slammed the door. Jeff turned around and faced the guards.

_"Mission accomplished."_

* * *

_"On the next 'Arrested Development'...or 'Community'..."_

The personnel at the lawyer's office gathered around Annie and applauded.

_"Annie finds her legal career going places."_

"We have an opening in the corner office." said Taylor. "And on the short list for that office is our newest star...Annie Edison!"

"It's like all of my dreams are coming true!" gushed Annie as the phone rang.

_"But then the truth catches up to her."_

The receptionist held out the phone and said "Annie, you have a phone call from a Craig Pelton. He wants to know if you're going to register for classes next semester."

Annie looked at him in shock as everyone else looked at her with suspicion.

Shirley sat in a church confessional.

_"Bothered by her more colorful language, Shirley seeks absolution."_

"Some of the stuff that's been coming out of my mouth." she said. "Those are things I never thought I would say to anyone."

"Look." said the priest. "A lot of people get mad sometimes. Sometimes, you just want to say '(bleep) it' and go off on those (bleep)s."

_"She finds herself in good company."_

Troy and Abed sat in chairs in front of a desk.

_"And Troy and Abed go to a Greendale notable for their documentary."_

On the other side of the desk sat an Asian man named Ben Chang.

"Hmmm, I don't know about making a guest appearance." he said. "Maybe a cameo."

AN: I just want to acknowledge that Garrett's line comes from Erik Charles Neilsen's actual stand-up routine. There's just one more (brief) chapter left.


	5. Closing Credit Tag

Community Psychology: A Study Of Arrested Development.

AN: This will be short, but that's because it's supposed to represent a closing credit tag from "Community".

Closing Credit Tag.

Pierce sat on a bench in the back of the cell while reading a newspaper. Jeff leaned against the door. Jeff turned to Pierce and whispered "Hey, Pierce. Is there, like, a private bathroom I can use?"

"Uh..." said Pierce. He looked around until he saw the in-cell toilet next to him. He tapped it with his foot and said "You're looking at it."

"No, no, no." whispered Jeff. "I can't use that. I, uh, I need privacy. Yeah, I've always been that way."

Pierce shot him an incredulous look.

"Come on, Pierce!" whispered Jeff. "If I'm gonna pass this key, I can't do it in front of these other guys!"

"Well, we could ask them all to leave." said Pierce. "But, um, there's this thing. They've been locking the doors lately, so..."

Pierce went back to reading the paper. Jeff leaned his head against the cell door in defeat.

"I've made a huge mistake." he muttered.

AN: And that concludes the story. Thank you for reading. You've been a wonderful audience.


End file.
